Blah Blah Blah

I know I know, I haven't really been so great at writing even though I have thought about it, but thinking about things does not get them done. That would be awesome if it could happen like that though, I could "think" of vaccuuming the house or "think" of folding the laundry...

We have had some great past couple of weeks. Our trip to CT was so enjoyable and I felt like David really got to spend some quality time with Nana and I always enjoy my visits with them. It scares me to think that any trip I take up there could be the last time I see her because she is just getting so old and frail.

We are now in the middle of September so football has started and we have started our ritual of awesome tailgates and hanging out with great friends.

I have been on the hunt for a part time job in the evenings and weekends because to be quite honest I have been having major anxiety over the "thought" of getting pregnant with no money saved up. It's funny how when you voice your opinions to friends or even family they all say the same thing... "You will never have enough money for kids" I agree there will never be enough..... but shouldn't you have SOMETHING? Between the debt David and I both have as well as the mortgage, it's hard to fathom how we would be able to accomplish juggling it all. I always knew I wouldn't be a full time stay at home mom and that I would have some sort of part time job to supplement for bills etc. Of course David is my rock and he says not to worry and that things have a way of working out but unless he knows a secret was to win the lottery I will continue to worry.

So the hunt.....I was offered a part time position at Restoration Hardware but the pay was not worth my time. I had 2 INCREDIBLE interviews at the new Container Store that is coming here and then got a call that they did not have a position for me, I felt like I was punched in the stomach! The Manager truly made me feel like I already had the job at the interview so to get the alarming news that I wasn't chosen seriously sucked. I had been basing everything around getting this job, budgeting what I could save and how long we would need to save and then it all crashed down in one 2 minute phonecall! "We had to make some tough decisions and unfortunately we don't have a position for you BUT you are at the top of our list if someone doesn't work out" yeah right I am sure they say that to everyone and I am now 2nd choice, which again is a horrible feeling.
The only options I feel I have at this point are going back to catering or some sort of food, which is okay but it is not consistent. I was looking forward to another weekly paycheck, learning new things, meeting new people. I have done all the food stuff and it's exhausting. HOWEVER I have an interview with caterer tomorrow and I have the opportunity to work an event on Saturday, so we'll see what happens. blah.